Smart People Don’t Seek Revenge: The Art of Letting Go

February 1, 2026

We have all felt it. That sudden, burning flash of heat in the chest when someone wrongs us. Maybe a colleague stole your idea, a friend betrayed your trust, or a driver cut you off in traffic. In that split second, the primitive part of our brain screams for one thing: Justice. We want to get even. We want to teach them a lesson. We want to make them feel the same pain they caused us.

It is a natural human reaction. But in the harsh, pragmatic world of the North, where survival depended on making smart choices, they had a very different view of this impulse. They didn't see revenge as strong; they saw it as stupid.

There is a cutting Icelandic proverb that sums up this philosophy perfectly:

"Löngum er hefnigjarnt lítið vit."

Translated into English, it means: "Vengefulness is often a sign of little wit."

The Intelligence of Restraint

This saying is a bit of a slap in the face to our ego. It suggests that if you are obsessed with getting even, you aren't showing how tough you are, you are showing how little you are thinking.

Why did the ancients believe this? Because a "witless" person (someone with lítið vit) only sees the immediate moment. They react. They strike back. They do not pause to ask, "What happens next?"

A wise person, on the other hand, plays the long game. They understand that revenge is an expensive luxury. It costs you time, it costs you energy, and it usually creates a messy chain reaction of consequences that hurts you more than the original offense.

The Trap of Tunnel Vision

When we are in "revenge mode," we get tunnel vision. We become obsessed with the person who hurt us. We replay the argument in the shower. We lose sleep plotting the perfect comeback.

This is why the proverb says revenge is "little wit", because it shrinks your world. You stop focusing on your own growth, your happiness, and your future, and instead, you give all your mental power to someone you don't even like. You let them live rent-free in your head. Is that smart?

How to Cool the "Revenge Heart"

So, how do you calm down when the fire is burning? How do you choose wisdom over "little wit"? Here are three ways to protect your peace:

1. Play the Movie Forward The foolish person acts on the first scene (the insult). The wise person watches the whole movie. Before you send that angry text or start that rumor, ask yourself: What happens next week? Will this escalate the drama? Will it make me look petty? Usually, when you visualize the messy aftermath, the desire for revenge fades.

2. The Cost-Benefit Analysis Treat your energy like money. If you spend three days being angry at a rude stranger, you have essentially paid them three days of your life. Are they worth that? A smart investor doesn't throw good money after bad assets. Don't throw good time after bad people.

3. The Best Revenge is a Good Life It is a cliché because it is true. The most stinging punishment you can inflict on an enemy is to ignore them completely and thrive. When you seek revenge, you are saying, "You are important to me." When you move on and succeed, you are saying, "You don't exist." That is the ultimate power move.

Choose Your Wit

"Löngum er hefnigjarnt lítið vit" is a reminder to value your own mind. You are too smart, too talented, and too busy to waste your "wit" on grudges.

The next time you feel the urge to get even, take a deep breath. Remember that the "hefnigjarnt" (vengeful) path is the path of the fool. Be the genius who walks away. Keep your head high, keep your heart light, and let the small people fight over small things while you move on to something better.

Word	Meaning
Löngum	Adverb. Meaning "for a long time" or "often/usually."
Er	Verb (vera). Meaning "is."
Hefnigjarnt	Adjective. Compound of hefnd (revenge) + gjarnt (prone to/eager for). Meaning "vengeful."
Lítið	Adjective meaning "little" or "small."
Vit	Noun meaning "wit," "sense," or "intelligence."